The “and 99 pence” thing has always annoyed me, chiefly because it shows that the average person is an idiot, to be able to be taken in by such a simple ruse. Which is why I was quite pleased when I learnt that Australians, with their lowest denomination coin being a 5c piece, had essentially done away with all that - till receipts will often show a “rounding” adjustment to shift it to the nearest 5 cents.
Now, I can understand remnants of the 99c practice still hanging around, where you're not paying a fixed price but a rate, e.g. $7.99 per kilo of bananas (I wish – it's currently $12.49, and $7.99'd still be more expensive than the UK!) or 3.4c per minute for phone calls.
What annoys the hell out of me, even more so than the original 99c practice itself, is that there are still any number of individual items that are priced to end in 99c. I bought a phone on Sunday for $49.99. Plus a cent. Why? The 99c practice is disingenuous enough because it's playing on people's psychology and the way we write our numbers. This is going one further – it's giving an item a price which people cannot possibly pay! (Unless they buy 5 things all of which end in a 99. Imagine that as a special offer - "Buy any 5 items and save ... erm, well, 0c really, but if you bought them all separately you'd pay 5c more!")
Wednesday, November 29, 2006
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
The Huh? Moments
This will be an irregularly and (hopefully!) infrequently added-to post, detailing my utter incomprehension when people have said things to me, or, to be entirely fair, the reverse. I may move this off into the sidebar at some point, if there are enough of them.
28/11/2006 - I order a sandwich : "Roast beef, mustard and onions please." "Do you want gravy as well?"
(same conversation) "Which bread would you like?" "What breads have you got?" {she points silently to several loaves on a table}
You Say Potato
Go on, say it, out loud. Now say tomato. They don't rhyme, at least not in an English accent. They don't rhyme in Strine (Australian accent – to see where it comes from, imagine an Aussie saying “Australian” then speed it up and slur it a bit) either, which is lucky, or I'd end up giggling my way through cookery programs or supermarket food aisles.
However, in Strine, the word data is pronounced in the tomato style, i.e. it's "darter" rather than "dayter."
And can I keep a straight face when I hear it used in the office? (That's a rhetorical question – I'm hoping the answer's obvious.) I've resorted to coughing whenever I hear people say it. I've not had to use it myself yet – I don't think I'll be able to contain myself. (It's not even like it's a particularly rare word – I can easily envisage me needing to use it on an almost daily basis.)
Perhaps I could retain a little foreign colour in my accent, and pronounce it properly. No point going fully native – I'm only here for 2 years.
However, in Strine, the word data is pronounced in the tomato style, i.e. it's "darter" rather than "dayter."
And can I keep a straight face when I hear it used in the office? (That's a rhetorical question – I'm hoping the answer's obvious.) I've resorted to coughing whenever I hear people say it. I've not had to use it myself yet – I don't think I'll be able to contain myself. (It's not even like it's a particularly rare word – I can easily envisage me needing to use it on an almost daily basis.)
Perhaps I could retain a little foreign colour in my accent, and pronounce it properly. No point going fully native – I'm only here for 2 years.
Monday, November 27, 2006
Snubbed
or
Why I Should Go to an Optician's
I've had glasses since I was about 14, but I very rarely wear them. In fact, there are only 2 reasons I do have them – firstly, because I'm just below the legal level of eyesight for driving in the UK, and secondly ... well, actually, there isn't a secondly.
Or at least, there wasn't until I moved to Melbourne.
Melbourne has a rather excellent tram system. It's similar to the Tube in London, but there are many more lines (I count at least 40), it's quite a bit cheaper, and they run to a proper timetable, which means you can plan your stumbling out of bed in the morning to perfection.
What's not so great is when you're waiting for a specific tram. They don't stop at every stop – they only stop on request. If you're on the tram, that's fine – there's a button on the more modern ones, or a funny pull-cord thing on the old ones. Off the tram, and you need to make it obvious to the driver that you'd like to get on. That's also fine – step out of the shelter, or wave your hand, or pick up your bags and look intentful (which may be a word I've just invented – so sue me, I'm feeling inventful at the moment).
If you know it's your tram that's coming.
And that's where reason 2 comes in. I can't actually see the line number on the tram until it's too close for it to stop, so 2 sailed past me yesterday, and I'd have missed another one this lunchtime if it weren't for the pedestrian crossing 50m further down the road meaning I had time to run to the next stop up. As there are 6 different lines running through the stop outside work, this could start to become a problem.
I will probably soon be able to pick out the destinations more easily than the line numbers, but as I haven't got my head round all of those yet (some trams don't go all the way along the lines, so there are 2 different destinations that I've seen on the best homewards tram for me), I'm stuck for the time being with snubbing by the tram drivers.
Or at least, there wasn't until I moved to Melbourne.
Melbourne has a rather excellent tram system. It's similar to the Tube in London, but there are many more lines (I count at least 40), it's quite a bit cheaper, and they run to a proper timetable, which means you can plan your stumbling out of bed in the morning to perfection.
What's not so great is when you're waiting for a specific tram. They don't stop at every stop – they only stop on request. If you're on the tram, that's fine – there's a button on the more modern ones, or a funny pull-cord thing on the old ones. Off the tram, and you need to make it obvious to the driver that you'd like to get on. That's also fine – step out of the shelter, or wave your hand, or pick up your bags and look intentful (which may be a word I've just invented – so sue me, I'm feeling inventful at the moment).
If you know it's your tram that's coming.
And that's where reason 2 comes in. I can't actually see the line number on the tram until it's too close for it to stop, so 2 sailed past me yesterday, and I'd have missed another one this lunchtime if it weren't for the pedestrian crossing 50m further down the road meaning I had time to run to the next stop up. As there are 6 different lines running through the stop outside work, this could start to become a problem.
I will probably soon be able to pick out the destinations more easily than the line numbers, but as I haven't got my head round all of those yet (some trams don't go all the way along the lines, so there are 2 different destinations that I've seen on the best homewards tram for me), I'm stuck for the time being with snubbing by the tram drivers.
The Slippery EelSlope
My nearest takeaway is a Japanese.
And I thought living near the Jaipur Spice was temptation enough.
And I thought living near the Jaipur Spice was temptation enough.
Saturday, November 25, 2006
#1 of x
19 days, it's taken me. And I jumped as much as usual.
I saw my first Australian spider today (first of this visit, anyway). It was not small (although I've seen ones of similar size in the UK). Unfortunately, I had to walk past it very close by in order to get to the gas meter, so I could get the serial number for it to be connected. Not fun. I was quite glad the serial number is only 6 characters long!
I was also the victim of bad timing today. I had the first call to my recently-acquired Aussie mobile while I was wrestling with an overly full sandwich. Sadly, my voicemail was set at the most hypersensitive setting (and try as I might, I can't change it), so it only rang twice and then switched off, by which time I'd managed to throw chicken and salad all over the table and drop teriyaki sauce all over my T-shirt. I'll just have to speak to them later instead!
I've bought my fridge, but it isn't in the flat yet. It will be delivered "some time in the next week" - I'm slowly learning that Australians have no concept of urgency, which in general is a state of mind I have a great deal of sympathy for, but not when I need a fridge! So I guess I'll be living on takeaways and non-refrigerated food till next week, then. That's not so easy here, not when days can get up to the mid-30s! There's quite a few snack bars and takeaways just round the corner which I will be frequenting. There are also a load of antique stores and wedding shops, for some reason - Armadale is the place to be if you want something old, new, borrowed or blue, with the emphasis on the old.
I saw my first Australian spider today (first of this visit, anyway). It was not small (although I've seen ones of similar size in the UK). Unfortunately, I had to walk past it very close by in order to get to the gas meter, so I could get the serial number for it to be connected. Not fun. I was quite glad the serial number is only 6 characters long!
I was also the victim of bad timing today. I had the first call to my recently-acquired Aussie mobile while I was wrestling with an overly full sandwich. Sadly, my voicemail was set at the most hypersensitive setting (and try as I might, I can't change it), so it only rang twice and then switched off, by which time I'd managed to throw chicken and salad all over the table and drop teriyaki sauce all over my T-shirt. I'll just have to speak to them later instead!
I've bought my fridge, but it isn't in the flat yet. It will be delivered "some time in the next week" - I'm slowly learning that Australians have no concept of urgency, which in general is a state of mind I have a great deal of sympathy for, but not when I need a fridge! So I guess I'll be living on takeaways and non-refrigerated food till next week, then. That's not so easy here, not when days can get up to the mid-30s! There's quite a few snack bars and takeaways just round the corner which I will be frequenting. There are also a load of antique stores and wedding shops, for some reason - Armadale is the place to be if you want something old, new, borrowed or blue, with the emphasis on the old.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
What Goes Up
The past few months seem to have been typified by some sort of highly localised and time-bound karma. Every time something positive happens, something else negative balances it out within about ten minutes.
I get my new flat signed for, I find out I can't pay for it except by cash, drawn painfully out of a hole in the wall in 4 £400 blocks.
I get a mobile phone, but it takes 3 days and the same number of calls to Customer Service to get it up and running.
I finally get myself a bank account, but the lady serving me behind the counter is so brain-dead as to not realise that 2 is less than 6 so has to take me through the Australian-resident setting-up process about 90% of the way (15 minutes or so) before realising her mathematical error and having to restart with the recent arrivals process, which takes about 30 seconds.
Or take today's little seesaw - my furniture is all moved in this morning (I could count the 6am wake-up to get to my place for 7.30am delivery as a downside, but it's quite a minor one), but I have neglected to request a fridge. Furniture purchase #1 will therefore be a fridge, unsurprisingly!
On a vaguely related topic, I went to a quite interesting (stated non-ironically) presentation about auditing yesterday - the highlight was my department head (the aforementioned English guy) seeing the delivery of the drinks just before the start of the talk, and finishing his introduction off as "the first presentation I've ever been to where they needed ice, and the first where they've provided sunscreen." (Australia does actually have fridges, but it appears that the staff bar does not. It does however provide sunscreen in an attractive industrial-sized jar, presumably for those playing tennis on the rooftop.)
Further to the topic of refrigeration (which wasn't going to be my theme of the day, but these things happen) - the thermometer has hit a peak of 36C for the second day running (it's nearly 8pm and dark, and the one on the building over the road is still showing 32C). This is not good for recently-arrived British people, especially quite hairy ones. I was quite amused, however, to read the e-mail sent around the office this morning. I'll have to paraphrase, as I don't have it to hand, but the gist was "We asked our building owners to fix our air conditioning in July, when we wouldn't be needing it. They scheduled the work for yesterday and today. Murphy's Law dictates that we should therefore have 2 days with highs of 36C. If you would like to remove your ties, please feel free to do so. We've also provided you with free water in the fridges."
In what I assume is an entirely unrelated incident, marketing restructures being apparently just as frequent and drastic as in the UK, the sender of the above e-mail has already left the company on garden leave!
Or take today's little seesaw - my furniture is all moved in this morning (I could count the 6am wake-up to get to my place for 7.30am delivery as a downside, but it's quite a minor one), but I have neglected to request a fridge. Furniture purchase #1 will therefore be a fridge, unsurprisingly!
On a vaguely related topic, I went to a quite interesting (stated non-ironically) presentation about auditing yesterday - the highlight was my department head (the aforementioned English guy) seeing the delivery of the drinks just before the start of the talk, and finishing his introduction off as "the first presentation I've ever been to where they needed ice, and the first where they've provided sunscreen." (Australia does actually have fridges, but it appears that the staff bar does not. It does however provide sunscreen in an attractive industrial-sized jar, presumably for those playing tennis on the rooftop.)
Further to the topic of refrigeration (which wasn't going to be my theme of the day, but these things happen) - the thermometer has hit a peak of 36C for the second day running (it's nearly 8pm and dark, and the one on the building over the road is still showing 32C). This is not good for recently-arrived British people, especially quite hairy ones. I was quite amused, however, to read the e-mail sent around the office this morning. I'll have to paraphrase, as I don't have it to hand, but the gist was "We asked our building owners to fix our air conditioning in July, when we wouldn't be needing it. They scheduled the work for yesterday and today. Murphy's Law dictates that we should therefore have 2 days with highs of 36C. If you would like to remove your ties, please feel free to do so. We've also provided you with free water in the fridges."
In what I assume is an entirely unrelated incident, marketing restructures being apparently just as frequent and drastic as in the UK, the sender of the above e-mail has already left the company on garden leave!
Monday, November 20, 2006
This Half
Firstly, Snow Patrol are playing here in February, and I'm going to get a ticket (or perhaps several) to see them - anyone fancy joining me?!
Secondly, and more relevantly, I've had a really enjoyable evening at my department head's this evening.
Their flat is amazing. It has a huge balcony with olive (and other) trees on it, with a clear view over the city centre and out to the hills east of Melbourne, it's really bright (virtually the whole of the "wall" between the balcony and the living area is actually window), an enormous open-plan kitchen and an inbuilt fountain in the entrance hall! They're renting, but one of the other flats in the block is on the market for $3.5m (or about £1.5m).
(Aside - funny thing, which I've only just realised, but I haven't actually looked at the exchange rate once since I've been here. Odd. Kind of doesn't matter for me except as a rough guide anyway, since I'm being paid in dollars.)
While it is a really excellent flat, and in the most desirable (subtle note - desirable, not desired - it's what someone else thinks of it that matters, not you!) suburb in Melbourne, that does seem a bit toppy to me. Still, I wouldn't turn my nose up at living there.
They do have a slightly overzealous security system on the garage, though - Clare had to go and wake up the owner of one of the other flats to help open find out how to open the garage door!
Clare had put on "traditional" Aussie tucker - meatloaf and tomato ketchup dip! - having forgotten I'd been here before. This was unfortunate, as the much more healthy and desirable (by all of us) but less "authentic" second option was a prawn and avocado salad. Oh well, next time!
We had a very long chat about all sorts of things, watched several Peter Gabriel DVDs (not sure why, other than David wanted to) and then the first part of The Castle, recommended viewing for anyone who wants to understand the Australian psyche (and also for David, Clare and me who were pointing at the screen and saying "Look, there's Melbourne, we live near there").
I think the best thing about this evening is simply that I've been out - not surrounded by the same 4 soulless hotel walls. I think David was right, that it will be very different once I'm in "my own" place - I'd already planned to get myself a new printer, so I can very quickly have some decent photos up on the walls to personalise it, and I can unpack things properly rather than have everything sort of unpacked but also ready to pack back into the suitcases at a moment's notice.
Secondly, and more relevantly, I've had a really enjoyable evening at my department head's this evening.
Their flat is amazing. It has a huge balcony with olive (and other) trees on it, with a clear view over the city centre and out to the hills east of Melbourne, it's really bright (virtually the whole of the "wall" between the balcony and the living area is actually window), an enormous open-plan kitchen and an inbuilt fountain in the entrance hall! They're renting, but one of the other flats in the block is on the market for $3.5m (or about £1.5m).
(Aside - funny thing, which I've only just realised, but I haven't actually looked at the exchange rate once since I've been here. Odd. Kind of doesn't matter for me except as a rough guide anyway, since I'm being paid in dollars.)
While it is a really excellent flat, and in the most desirable (subtle note - desirable, not desired - it's what someone else thinks of it that matters, not you!) suburb in Melbourne, that does seem a bit toppy to me. Still, I wouldn't turn my nose up at living there.
They do have a slightly overzealous security system on the garage, though - Clare had to go and wake up the owner of one of the other flats to help open find out how to open the garage door!
Clare had put on "traditional" Aussie tucker - meatloaf and tomato ketchup dip! - having forgotten I'd been here before. This was unfortunate, as the much more healthy and desirable (by all of us) but less "authentic" second option was a prawn and avocado salad. Oh well, next time!
We had a very long chat about all sorts of things, watched several Peter Gabriel DVDs (not sure why, other than David wanted to) and then the first part of The Castle, recommended viewing for anyone who wants to understand the Australian psyche (and also for David, Clare and me who were pointing at the screen and saying "Look, there's Melbourne, we live near there").
I think the best thing about this evening is simply that I've been out - not surrounded by the same 4 soulless hotel walls. I think David was right, that it will be very different once I'm in "my own" place - I'd already planned to get myself a new printer, so I can very quickly have some decent photos up on the walls to personalise it, and I can unpack things properly rather than have everything sort of unpacked but also ready to pack back into the suitcases at a moment's notice.
Saturday, November 18, 2006
A Part
Rather fortunately, I still liked my new flat when I went to see it again! It's also quite a lot handier for work and the city than I thought - tram took less than 10 minutes from work to the flat, and a 2-minute walk and 10-minute train ride had me back in the city centre. Electricity isn't connected, though, so I can't move in just yet. I've used the address a few times already for various things (loyalty card at the big bookshop in town and for my new mobile phone).
On the topic of which - I've never owned a camera phone before, and I can now see the advantages of having one. I can see myself wandering round Melbourne spotting odd things I might want to take a photo of (the boards outside the nearby pub have had several choice phrases I could have shown a certain Welshman - "Avoid dehydration - drink beer!" and "Take time to savour your drink - the pub is not on fire.") So expect to see a few low-quality Flickr posts in the near future.
I've already started to meet a few expats. After being told off by the payroll department (for not having a working bank account yet!) I went to give them all the details I could, and found Jenny from Derby working there. She and her husband emigrated here (I need to get that phraseology right, as I'll likely be using it a lot - did they in fact immigrate here?) a couple of months ago and are really enjoying it, except for the lack of tea. So I've promised I'll pass them on a box once mine arrive on the ship! I also managed to get chatty with several people in the wider department when I accidentally found myself being the host of the Friday afternoon Finance quiz - it used to be held at my desk, so I had to take part in quite a central way.
Oh, and one final thing - any country where you can get takeaway sushi for lunch on every street corner is one where I'm happy to live.
On the topic of which - I've never owned a camera phone before, and I can now see the advantages of having one. I can see myself wandering round Melbourne spotting odd things I might want to take a photo of (the boards outside the nearby pub have had several choice phrases I could have shown a certain Welshman - "Avoid dehydration - drink beer!" and "Take time to savour your drink - the pub is not on fire.") So expect to see a few low-quality Flickr posts in the near future.
I've already started to meet a few expats. After being told off by the payroll department (for not having a working bank account yet!) I went to give them all the details I could, and found Jenny from Derby working there. She and her husband emigrated here (I need to get that phraseology right, as I'll likely be using it a lot - did they in fact immigrate here?) a couple of months ago and are really enjoying it, except for the lack of tea. So I've promised I'll pass them on a box once mine arrive on the ship! I also managed to get chatty with several people in the wider department when I accidentally found myself being the host of the Friday afternoon Finance quiz - it used to be held at my desk, so I had to take part in quite a central way.
Oh, and one final thing - any country where you can get takeaway sushi for lunch on every street corner is one where I'm happy to live.
Thursday, November 16, 2006
Things are Moving
I'm quite looking forward to going round to the new place on Saturday and starting to get together all the bits and pieces I'll need, then actually moving in properly next week. I've got a 41-item list put together for it already, and I'm sure it'll be a higher number by Saturday!
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Turning on a Dime
The new flat is signed for, all the utilities will be connected over the next couple of days, and furniture will be moved in on Tuesday. Why, then, is there still hassle about it? The relocation consultant, who for some reason I just can't speak to at all without one of us doing the telephone equivalent of a blank stare, wants to organise it all for me. I've done it already! If you wanted to do it, tell me before it's done! And stop rushing me to do it faster than I wanted to!
"But if you start the lease from tomorrow, you'll be paying but you won't be able to move in as you won't have any furniture." Yes, I know, but last week you were the one who said tomorrow might be leaving it a bit too long. Plus also, that's my problem, isn't it? I can go round on Saturday, have a proper look at what I will and won't need on a day 1 / week 1 / month 1 basis, write a list, and bring it all back ready for me to move in properly next week.
And who, outside of low-quality TV drama, finishes a phone call with "Be well, Chris"?
I'm having to rant at the internet because there isn't anyone else handy at the moment that I can do it at.
In that general area, I've at least had some sensible conversations with people around the office, and a free sushi/sandwich lunch with one of my team members (will be having similar meetings with the other two in the next week). I also out-one-linered the CFO, whom I'd just met. Snap character judgement said that'd go down well with him - fingers crossed!
"But if you start the lease from tomorrow, you'll be paying but you won't be able to move in as you won't have any furniture." Yes, I know, but last week you were the one who said tomorrow might be leaving it a bit too long. Plus also, that's my problem, isn't it? I can go round on Saturday, have a proper look at what I will and won't need on a day 1 / week 1 / month 1 basis, write a list, and bring it all back ready for me to move in properly next week.
And who, outside of low-quality TV drama, finishes a phone call with "Be well, Chris"?
I'm having to rant at the internet because there isn't anyone else handy at the moment that I can do it at.
In that general area, I've at least had some sensible conversations with people around the office, and a free sushi/sandwich lunch with one of my team members (will be having similar meetings with the other two in the next week). I also out-one-linered the CFO, whom I'd just met. Snap character judgement said that'd go down well with him - fingers crossed!
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Old Acquaintances
Several things stick out in my memory of Melbourne and Australia from my trip last year.
First, Boost juice bars - I drank enough of these to get a 10% discount loyalty card, which, I discovered yesterday, still works. I went back to the same bar I got it at, for nostalgia's sake. Then I had another one later on yesterday, and another today!
Secondly, parks. I spent about half a day in the Botanical Gardens last year, and plenty more time in the other assorted parks around the city. I walked into town via the Botanical Gardens today - I am enjoying the summery weather as a contrast to my usual November!
Thirdly, walking, something I did an awful lot of last year. In keeping with that, I think I may have done 10 miles yesterday. Certainly my legs and feet were tired enough to have done so.
And on another topic, assuming I can cobble together a banker's draft at a distance of 12,000 miles from my bank (pound to a penny ... dollar to a cent HSBC doesn't inhabit the "global village"), I've got the flat in Armadale. I'll post pics once I've moved in and acquired some furniture.
First, Boost juice bars - I drank enough of these to get a 10% discount loyalty card, which, I discovered yesterday, still works. I went back to the same bar I got it at, for nostalgia's sake. Then I had another one later on yesterday, and another today!
Secondly, parks. I spent about half a day in the Botanical Gardens last year, and plenty more time in the other assorted parks around the city. I walked into town via the Botanical Gardens today - I am enjoying the summery weather as a contrast to my usual November!
Thirdly, walking, something I did an awful lot of last year. In keeping with that, I think I may have done 10 miles yesterday. Certainly my legs and feet were tired enough to have done so.
And on another topic, assuming I can cobble together a banker's draft at a distance of 12,000 miles from my bank (pound to a penny ... dollar to a cent HSBC doesn't inhabit the "global village"), I've got the flat in Armadale. I'll post pics once I've moved in and acquired some furniture.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
On Flat-hunting
The property rental market in Melbourne is decidedly a seller's one at the moment. To the extent that, of the 12 properties my relocation consultant had yesterday arranged to see today, 5 had gone by the time we set off this morning, and another one after we'd seen it during the day.
So of the 6 that we saw, there was a fair amount of variety. 2 very new flats, one with only one bedroom and the other really nice and very central but far too small. 4 flats in reasonably old buildings - these were all very good. As seems traditional with Australian housing, each of them was totally different from the others.
So I've put my name down for one in Armadale - fingers crossed (the back-up is one in South Yarra that I'd be just as happy with). It's slightly further away from the city centre than I'd originally planned, but it's 100 yards from a tram stop, 200 from a local train station and half a mile from a supermarket. Google Maps says it's 2.3 miles from work, so walkable at a push, but it'll probably be a tram. It's totally unfurnished, though, which is a small stumbling point - means I will need to rent some furniture and make use of one of the bits of my employment package I thought sounded a bit funny when offered it.
I really have to start getting my head round this metric system!
So of the 6 that we saw, there was a fair amount of variety. 2 very new flats, one with only one bedroom and the other really nice and very central but far too small. 4 flats in reasonably old buildings - these were all very good. As seems traditional with Australian housing, each of them was totally different from the others.
So I've put my name down for one in Armadale - fingers crossed (the back-up is one in South Yarra that I'd be just as happy with). It's slightly further away from the city centre than I'd originally planned, but it's 100 yards from a tram stop, 200 from a local train station and half a mile from a supermarket. Google Maps says it's 2.3 miles from work, so walkable at a push, but it'll probably be a tram. It's totally unfurnished, though, which is a small stumbling point - means I will need to rent some furniture and make use of one of the bits of my employment package I thought sounded a bit funny when offered it.
I really have to start getting my head round this metric system!
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
Journey and Destination
£625 of excess baggage charges, two cut fingers, an aching back and several hasty repacks of my hand luggage later, I'm finally here!
There were a few tears as I left York. Firstly, walking round my flat for the last time, and secondly, American English came on the ipod just as I drove over the bridge on the ringroad and I saw the Minster for the last time. Driving tear-blinded isn't good. I kept seeing reminders of Oz on the way over - a car numberplate AU51 BEN, Jet's Are You Going To Be My Girl? playing in the services and Bachelor Girl being the last song to play as I arrived at my parents'.
The mad rules regarding single pieces of hand luggage on planes are still in force - no get-outs for laptops or anything else. So I had to quickly unpack and repack my backpack to fit everything in - fortunately I just managed to get the PC in there. Without blood all over it. It's a pretty heavy laptop too, unfortunately, hence the bad back.
Some rather blank looks from the check-in lady at Manchester - I think each of us was expecting the other to say something. "I'm emigrating, so I've got excess baggage." "You're allowed 20 kgs, and you've got 61." "Yes?" "That's 41 kg overweight." "Yes..." "You're going to have to pay excess baggage charges." "Yes!" I had to go through this again at Heathrow (to avoid paying £1700 of charges!) but with a slightly less dim attendant and with more knowledge of how my side of the conversation was supposed to work.
The 12hr leg from Heathrow was possibly the best flight I've ever had - I've been so knackered these last few weeks that I slept for 7 hours solid after they served the first meal. I then watched the first half of the World Trade Centre film (got a bit too disgusted to carry on at the point where Jesus made an appearance) and Lucky Number Slevin (good but not great).
Second leg from Singapore to Melbourne was less comfortable, but was only 7 hours, so was OKish. Stuck the Ipod on and read for most of it.
Then I was met at the airport by one of my new colleagues, Peter. Who has a beard. I point this out for my audience only - it's not the first thing I notice when I meet people. He drove me to my new flat, which is not really very central (about 3 miles out of the city centre) but is reasonably well located near St Kilda itself - appears I was pretty rubbish at estimating the distance when I was here last year! Unfortunately, Wagamama's, purveyors of the delicious ice cream, has closed.
Getting over the jetlag has not been a triumph this time. I fell asleep on Monday morning for 3 hours, then again a bit in the evening, and woke at 4am, unable to return to sleep. Tuesday was reasonably similar - slept pretty much straight through from 1pm till 6pm (despite really needing to go and get a mobile phone and a bank account) then from 11pm to 2.30am, and nothing thereafter. Still sleepy now, after a day at work!
There were a few tears as I left York. Firstly, walking round my flat for the last time, and secondly, American English came on the ipod just as I drove over the bridge on the ringroad and I saw the Minster for the last time. Driving tear-blinded isn't good. I kept seeing reminders of Oz on the way over - a car numberplate AU51 BEN, Jet's Are You Going To Be My Girl? playing in the services and Bachelor Girl being the last song to play as I arrived at my parents'.
The mad rules regarding single pieces of hand luggage on planes are still in force - no get-outs for laptops or anything else. So I had to quickly unpack and repack my backpack to fit everything in - fortunately I just managed to get the PC in there. Without blood all over it. It's a pretty heavy laptop too, unfortunately, hence the bad back.
Some rather blank looks from the check-in lady at Manchester - I think each of us was expecting the other to say something. "I'm emigrating, so I've got excess baggage." "You're allowed 20 kgs, and you've got 61." "Yes?" "That's 41 kg overweight." "Yes..." "You're going to have to pay excess baggage charges." "Yes!" I had to go through this again at Heathrow (to avoid paying £1700 of charges!) but with a slightly less dim attendant and with more knowledge of how my side of the conversation was supposed to work.
The 12hr leg from Heathrow was possibly the best flight I've ever had - I've been so knackered these last few weeks that I slept for 7 hours solid after they served the first meal. I then watched the first half of the World Trade Centre film (got a bit too disgusted to carry on at the point where Jesus made an appearance) and Lucky Number Slevin (good but not great).
Second leg from Singapore to Melbourne was less comfortable, but was only 7 hours, so was OKish. Stuck the Ipod on and read for most of it.
Then I was met at the airport by one of my new colleagues, Peter. Who has a beard. I point this out for my audience only - it's not the first thing I notice when I meet people. He drove me to my new flat, which is not really very central (about 3 miles out of the city centre) but is reasonably well located near St Kilda itself - appears I was pretty rubbish at estimating the distance when I was here last year! Unfortunately, Wagamama's, purveyors of the delicious ice cream, has closed.
Getting over the jetlag has not been a triumph this time. I fell asleep on Monday morning for 3 hours, then again a bit in the evening, and woke at 4am, unable to return to sleep. Tuesday was reasonably similar - slept pretty much straight through from 1pm till 6pm (despite really needing to go and get a mobile phone and a bank account) then from 11pm to 2.30am, and nothing thereafter. Still sleepy now, after a day at work!
The Price of Bananas
While in Venezuela, Arlene and I (and others) had a passing conversation about the recent failure of the Aussie banana crop, and on how bananas were now quite expensive. I now realise she wasn't exaggerating. Bananas are $12 / kg in the local supermarket.
To put that into a slightly different context, I bought a bunch of 5, and it cost 80p per banana!
Time to find a different fruit to eat loads of...
To put that into a slightly different context, I bought a bunch of 5, and it cost 80p per banana!
Time to find a different fruit to eat loads of...
Saturday, November 04, 2006
A-Day
It's arrived at last. I've been working towards this for over 4 months, never ever quite believing it was going to arrive. Now it has, it feels like nothing at all. It's just not there yet. 4ish tomorrow as I walk through the gate? I hope so.
I've not shaken so many people's hands before in one day since Faheem's wedding, and probably never hugged so many people ever. Even so, I missed quite a few, like Jenny, Nina, Colin, Stevie, Miriam, Pete C, Newberry and Buckle, and very nearly didn't see Stouty and Emma.
I was very not happy at several points in the day. First - "Oh, it's good to see you're finally implementing the clear-desk policy, Chris." Second was the meeting I was dragged into at 4.45 to explain why we were now 3 days late. That one I did manage to turn into a positive, as I was able to pull the rug from under everyone by saying everything looked OK to me now, and we were back on track. Yay me! (Was a very good ending to a very bad afternoon.)
People I'll probably see out in Oz :
Lint & Kathleen
Tom & Helen
Tsuki & Dom
Pete & Emma
Neil & Ali
Drew
Possibles :
Drew & Cat
Daryl
Jealy & Caroline
Gemma & Tom
Josephine & James
Rich & Liz
Bound to have missed plenty off here. I'll probably add to them over the next few months.
I've not shaken so many people's hands before in one day since Faheem's wedding, and probably never hugged so many people ever. Even so, I missed quite a few, like Jenny, Nina, Colin, Stevie, Miriam, Pete C, Newberry and Buckle, and very nearly didn't see Stouty and Emma.
I was very not happy at several points in the day. First - "Oh, it's good to see you're finally implementing the clear-desk policy, Chris." Second was the meeting I was dragged into at 4.45 to explain why we were now 3 days late. That one I did manage to turn into a positive, as I was able to pull the rug from under everyone by saying everything looked OK to me now, and we were back on track. Yay me! (Was a very good ending to a very bad afternoon.)
People I'll probably see out in Oz :
Lint & Kathleen
Tom & Helen
Tsuki & Dom
Pete & Emma
Neil & Ali
Drew
Possibles :
Drew & Cat
Daryl
Jealy & Caroline
Gemma & Tom
Josephine & James
Rich & Liz
Bound to have missed plenty off here. I'll probably add to them over the next few months.
Friday, November 03, 2006
Memories of the York Era
Note - these aren't all memories of York, they're memories of the period of my life when I lived there.
- Sports : gliding, gorge walking, tennis, squash and badminton, the 3 Peaks, my marathon, skiing trips * 3, rowing
- Events : PTHs, my "leaving party" on 30/12/04, Tsuki's 22nd in 3LM, Assizes of Ale, my 30th, Toto's chair, the Ujala self-immolation incident, qualifying, the LOTR day, the drunken conversations in Mazimaz and the 3LM, Henman at the assessment centre, the pack of cards trip
- People : too many to mention, and I'd only be told off if I left anyone out
- Things : the last Buffy, the last Friends, all of Babylon 5, Earnest, fuffee, projector TVs, GTA-SA, ginger beer, Boost juice
- Places : Venezuela, Minster Gardens, Precentor's Court, Trinity Lane, my flat, the OWS and the Swan, Rod Laver Arena, Al Fresco, Karachi, the Eden Project
- Random : the Snickleways walk, the Poppy Challenge, singing happy birthday to a random stranger on Tom's birthday in Ask, Mr Magoo's leaving party trip to Buzz, Mario Karts, the people with a potato, the "4 1-inch penises" night
- Downers : Bert's housewarming in Glasgow, year-end 05, Queen Anne's Road
- Sports : gliding, gorge walking, tennis, squash and badminton, the 3 Peaks, my marathon, skiing trips * 3, rowing
- Events : PTHs, my "leaving party" on 30/12/04, Tsuki's 22nd in 3LM, Assizes of Ale, my 30th, Toto's chair, the Ujala self-immolation incident, qualifying, the LOTR day, the drunken conversations in Mazimaz and the 3LM, Henman at the assessment centre, the pack of cards trip
- People : too many to mention, and I'd only be told off if I left anyone out
- Things : the last Buffy, the last Friends, all of Babylon 5, Earnest, fuffee, projector TVs, GTA-SA, ginger beer, Boost juice
- Places : Venezuela, Minster Gardens, Precentor's Court, Trinity Lane, my flat, the OWS and the Swan, Rod Laver Arena, Al Fresco, Karachi, the Eden Project
- Random : the Snickleways walk, the Poppy Challenge, singing happy birthday to a random stranger on Tom's birthday in Ask, Mr Magoo's leaving party trip to Buzz, Mario Karts, the people with a potato, the "4 1-inch penises" night
- Downers : Bert's housewarming in Glasgow, year-end 05, Queen Anne's Road
67 Hours
I still can't get my head round the fact that in that amount of time, I'll have moved to another country. I arrive in Melbourne 6.25am on Monday. I can't make it feel real at all. I'll probably have the same kind of moment on Saturday as I did last year when I step through the barrier at Manchester - definitely hoping I do, as that's still one of the most memorable moments of my life.
David's leaving speech was very good - much much better than Mon's! He's not a natural public speaker, but he did very well. There was a quiz on Australian English (I got 5 out of 6), and stories brought up included me hitting my head with my own ski, getting locked in the toilet in my final exam, self-immolation in the Ujala, the PV=nRT moment, and of course my detention at US Customs last year for having a beard, a tan, a Pakistani visa and a dirt-common name.
PTH XIII tonight - likely to be my last ever (since even if I do come back, I don't see the tradition carrying on for very much longer). Very fun, as ever. The theme being pubs of York, and us having chosen the Three Legged Mare, Tom and I were tied together by the legs 3-leggeding around town for much of the evening.
I was touched by the several goodbyes I've had this evening. Matt H, Cat, Mark L, Daryl, and amused by the one from two new graduates I've never spoken to before and probably never will again...
David's leaving speech was very good - much much better than Mon's! He's not a natural public speaker, but he did very well. There was a quiz on Australian English (I got 5 out of 6), and stories brought up included me hitting my head with my own ski, getting locked in the toilet in my final exam, self-immolation in the Ujala, the PV=nRT moment, and of course my detention at US Customs last year for having a beard, a tan, a Pakistani visa and a dirt-common name.
PTH XIII tonight - likely to be my last ever (since even if I do come back, I don't see the tradition carrying on for very much longer). Very fun, as ever. The theme being pubs of York, and us having chosen the Three Legged Mare, Tom and I were tied together by the legs 3-leggeding around town for much of the evening.
I was touched by the several goodbyes I've had this evening. Matt H, Cat, Mark L, Daryl, and amused by the one from two new graduates I've never spoken to before and probably never will again...
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
Not On Fire
Things about me that disappoint others :
I don't get drunk often enough.
Because of that, I remember every single thing that other people do.
I cheat at CNPS. (Technically, the cheating aspect involves me living further out of town than Lint and having to walk in to work along one of the busiest rush-hour roads into York. Not strictly against the rules!)
I don't have enough character flaws to be a believable protagonist in a novel.
I didn't know Emma at the time of my 30th birthday, and hence didn't invite here to my party.
Things that people like about me :
I make fun of people in such a nice way that they don't mind.
I can laugh at anything - everything's funny.
I don't use an umbrella, so if it's raining, Tsuki can take comfort in the fact that I make her look dry.
For all of my negative points, there's a positive one that more than cancels it out. E.g. I hate garlic, but I counteract that problem by having a perpetual cold.
I received a going-away gift of a plastic bow tie sellotaped to my collar by Emma, who briefly fell asleep on my shoulder while attaching it to me. We also talked about whether I'm going to have to heckle at my own leaving speech in order to make it actually funny, whether Immacing of my beard and heavy drinking will be taking place on Friday (not if I have anything to say on the matter, they won't) and the continuation, but not conclusion, of a long-running talk with Helen about what I'm going to miss about the UK (sorry Helen, I'm not being obstructive, I genuinely can't tell at the moment - I won't know till I'm there and missing them!)
Cancelling broadband - far easier than I thought.
Cancelling a BT phone line - easy once they answered the phone, which took about 15 minutes.
I'm borderline finished with my to-do list, finally. I have a number of services left to cancel or switch into my tenants' names, like gas, electricity and council tax, I've got to pack all my clothes and everything else that I'm taking on the plane, and there are little bits and pieces of things around the flat I've got to finish off with, but there's nothing else I can do now. There are a few things on there that I haven't done in the end, like getting an Oz bank account set up and selling my car, but they were all non-vital things, so I've not done too badly.
Kind of glad I'm finished, because it means I can go out every night and not have to spend time in the quite depressingly vacant flat.
Things that people like about me :
I received a going-away gift of a plastic bow tie sellotaped to my collar by Emma, who briefly fell asleep on my shoulder while attaching it to me. We also talked about whether I'm going to have to heckle at my own leaving speech in order to make it actually funny, whether Immacing of my beard and heavy drinking will be taking place on Friday (not if I have anything to say on the matter, they won't) and the continuation, but not conclusion, of a long-running talk with Helen about what I'm going to miss about the UK (sorry Helen, I'm not being obstructive, I genuinely can't tell at the moment - I won't know till I'm there and missing them!)
Cancelling broadband - far easier than I thought.
Cancelling a BT phone line - easy once they answered the phone, which took about 15 minutes.
I'm borderline finished with my to-do list, finally. I have a number of services left to cancel or switch into my tenants' names, like gas, electricity and council tax, I've got to pack all my clothes and everything else that I'm taking on the plane, and there are little bits and pieces of things around the flat I've got to finish off with, but there's nothing else I can do now. There are a few things on there that I haven't done in the end, like getting an Oz bank account set up and selling my car, but they were all non-vital things, so I've not done too badly.
Kind of glad I'm finished, because it means I can go out every night and not have to spend time in the quite depressingly vacant flat.
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